WD's Favourite Quotes Which May Help People Through Life...

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...or Not as The Case May Be...

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Comedy

Sometimes I want to have you executed, just to see the expression on your face...

- Queenie, to Blackadder

Blackadder II
Old King Cole was a merry old soul, and a merry old soul was he,

He called for a light in the middle of the night to go to the lavatory.

The light shone on the lavvy door, the candle had a fit,

So Old King Cole fell down the hole and landed in a pile of...

(change of rhythm)

...shhhhhine your buttons and brasses!

They only cost 10 p a tin.

You can buy 'em or nick 'em from Woolies*

They always fill up to the brim!


- Anonymous

Playground chant for those with no morals
You are ugly Madam, but I will be sober in the morning.

- Winston Churchill

British Prime Minister; his second most famous uttering next to We will fight them on the beaches...
What is the next number in this sequence?

1, 2, 3, 4...?


- Richard and Judy

An actual question on Midday Money

Love

I'm a ridiculous creature;

I'm like a bird without wings.

My heart's in permanent winter-

Yours is forever spring.

You're a truly lovely thing.


- Born With a Broken Heart

Neil Hannon of The Divine Comedy
Men grow cold

As girls grow old,

And we all lose our charms in the end.

But square-cut or pear shaped,

These rocks don't lose their shape -
smiley - Diamonds are a girl's best friend!


- Marilyn Monroe

From Gentlemen Prefer Blondes
I ran into my ex today.

Then I put it in reverse and ran him over again.


- Anonymous
My heart for now is a private road:

'No Throroughfare', 'No head alone',

'No Slow Traffic', 'No Graphic Details',

Colder collsions....


- Bent - Private Road

Life

The stars are only in the sky.

- Marat Safin; US Open Winner 2000

When asked what life was like being a star

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Infinite Improbability Drive

Infinite Improbability Drive

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