Ask Prof Archives

1 Conversation

Ask Prof

Each week (no, every two weeks. No, whenever he feels like it), the great Professor Christopher Tonks dishes out his views on the latest topics of interest, scientific and political facts, and news from Alabaster House and the Space Station Big C. He also invites you to write him question-bearing letters, which he answers with considerable vim and knowledge. Below are the past issues of Ask Prof, neatly arranged with the latest one at the top.

12: 11/10/01 - False Laws and Pseudo Theories...

I felt it was about time to show you all the truth behind the principal of Earth-science, possibly the most untrue practice ever, uh, practiced.

Only one letter to answer today, but we get quite technical, talking as we do about numerical bases.

11: 04/10/01 - It's a Matter of Time...

After two weeks of delays (it's all my fault, I admit it!), we finally settle back to what could be called normal, myself discussing in detail the San Beta Time System. I also show you my latest creation: the Ask Prof theme tune!

Top questions this week, as I answer your puzzlements about homework in San Beta and even Typicality.

10: 13/09/01 - The Spillage of Real Life

This was of course the week of the terrorist attacks on America, and thusly I changed my style to express my own views on the situation, perhaps revealing the glimmer of hope behind it.

No letters were answered this week, for obvious reasons.

9: 06/09/01 - Electricity. Never Take It For Granted...

Time for a little scandal, methinks! Today I delve into the inner workings of the subatomics, the tiny race responsible for supplying our world with electricity.

That Cat gets a sound thrashing again, and moons get a good going over too, with particular reference to Gagranchia, planet of Time.

8: 30/08/01 - A Planet of Total Harmlessness...

I decided to give you all an extract of my great LoaGO DataBase for you to savour. This week, the great planet of San Beta, capital of the GalaGroup.

Shrödinger's feline companion was remarked upon again in these letters, along with one poor soul who had lost her question.

7: 09/08/01 - We're all going on a summer holiday...

Not much of a main section this week, as I was prepping to go on holiday. I did worry about how the Post would survive without my column for two weeks.

Four! Four, I tell you! The letters ranged from magical toasters to pollution, through a Shrödinger anti-gravity drive and doctors in space.

6: 02/08/01 - Can I smell something burning?

What can I say? Of all things in the cosmos, toast was talked about in perhaps too much detail this week, mainly about how I can never get it to cook without burning.

One letter was the total for the week, but the subject was well chosen: toasters!

5: 26/07/01 - HoaGO - Home of a GalaGroup Overseer...

Many a paragraph was today produced on the subject of my home vessel, the Space Station Big C. The theory behind teleportation is introduced to the public, and references made to my upcoming journey to San Beta.

Again the usual three letters. This time they spoke of evil and lizards, the tenth planet of the Sol system, and the dating of the pyramids.

4: 19/07/01 - If evil ruled the world...

Evil was the theme of the week, and I rambled on for quite a bit on the subjects of lizard characteristics and evil laughs.

Three letters this week, concerning alternate realities, magical mishaps and the offering of bread-based snacks.

3: 12/07/01 - Third time lucky...

The only thing in the introduction this week was a joke about the Government of San Beta, as the letters took up too much space!

The letters concerned GalaGroups and their Overseers, penguin mages performing dangerous magic in the pursuit of an argument, and the San Beta electoral system.

2: 05/07/01 - Of elections and pan-dimensional colonists...

This week I talked at great length about the San Beta electoral system and apologised for my overly technical joke last week.

Only one letter this time, concerning the discovery of orbitless planets, actually the homes for colonies of pan-dimensional aliens.

1: 28/06/01 - In the beginning, a column was created...

In the first issue of Ask Prof, I act perhaps a tad overenthusiastic and get carried away with jokes from other planets.

No letters this week of course, but I do enthuse that you send me some!

Bookmark on your Personal Space

Conversations About This Entry



Infinite Improbability Drive

Infinite Improbability Drive

Read a random Edited Entry

Written and Edited by



h2g2 is created by h2g2's users, who are members of the public. The views expressed are theirs and unless specifically stated are not those of the Not Panicking Ltd. Unlike Edited Entries, Entries have not been checked by an Editor. If you consider any Entry to be in breach of the site's House Rules, please register a complaint. For any other comments, please visit the Feedback page.

Write an Entry

"The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is a wholly remarkable book. It has been compiled and recompiled many times and under many different editorships. It contains contributions from countless numbers of travellers and researchers."

Write an entry
Read more