Sex, Drugs and Sausage Rolls!- badgers Tony Curtis and a family of chinchillas, plus of course the Bondage Pony.

Top Notch Preacher and Bearer of the Evil Twin's Moustache

The Rainbow FlagA crest depicting a chinchilla called 'Greg' wearing a spiked collar.go on, smilecreate May 2012Create September 2012

Only a life lived in the service to others is worth living.

Out in what 'they' call the 'real world

The only way of finding the limits of the possible is by going beyond them into the impossible.

2legs was, through entirely his own fault born some time on the 9th November 1976 in a badger cet on the outskirts of Suffolk UK.

During most of his formative years 2legs was involved with various elite badger attack squads in the fenland areas, embarking on multiple assaults on neighbouring rabbit colonies.

Life has always taken place in a tumult without apparent cohesion, but it only finds its grandeur and its reality in ecstasy and in ecstatic love.

By a strange fluke of chance, but mainly due to a large swamp creature, a house full of transexual chinchillas, a bewildering array of petunia and lamposts, and a large number of very peculiar Dwarves, and of course, the bondage pony, 2legs embarked on education which managed to include 3 A levels, a first class honers degree, a Masters degree and absolutely zilth ability to spel or do math.

Life is just High School with money

Currently residing in Cambridge UK, 2legs lives in a gothic mansion built by the late Winstone Blubberhouse and which is guarded by platoons of trained attack badgers and wild swamp creatures.

He is happily, and probably also insanely, married, to a fabulus Dom, and is also collared to a beautiful Domme. Which does somewhat seem to suggest polyamory, one assumes.

7. You need only two tools. WD-40 and duct tape. If it doesn't move and it should, use WD-40. If it moves and shouldn't, use the tape. 5

2legs's passtimes include

  • cooking
  • Trying to be a very good boy
  • reading
  • messing about with computer recording sofware and playing guitar and Bass and listening to music
  • Kink and BDSM and debauchery

For heavens sake, it's a person you get attracted to, not a set of genitals! 6

2legs is a scorpio starsign, but doesn't give much credance to such things. He has a wardrobe of largely black shirts and jeans, and drawers full of black briefs, pants, knickers and thongs. 7

Pleasure only starts once the worm has got into the fruit, to become delightful happiness must be tainted with poison. 8

What do ties matter, Jeeves, at a time like this?
There is no time, sir, at which ties do not matter.

Who is this '2legs'?

Registered on HooToo on something like the 22nd March 2001, after not doing much with an old long lost account from December 2000, I've been... well...

....Well here's what other people have to say abouts me on here.... ....

  • 'You're Just weird' - U226093
  • 'there's not much of you left to see ... thank Bob for that thong'.... 'he's a great bloke, a funny online persona, and an all round bundle of great.'... - Roymondo
  • 'God, this guy can drink' --- Skankyrich
  • '2legs is the uncaused cause. He is his own cannonball, timeless and immutable... Scary thought huh?' ---- BouncyBleepImZentrum
  • '2legs does a mean balloon dance' ---- lil
  • 'we love him. my life would be poorer without him to brighten my day' ----- Tabitca
  • 'even I have heard of his mighty thong! I am thankful not to have seen it.' ---- Not Him
  • 'God this guy hoovers a lot' ----- General Tamaire the Walrus
  • 'You trod on my sanity and broke it' ----Brown Eyed Girl
  • 'youre like a sister to me' -----Serephina
  • 'Not a friend more a way of life' ---Granny Weatherwax
  • 'You were mental' - --fords
  • 'your velvet tones while talking on the phon .... I wanted to bundle you up, keep you for my own personal pleasure and introduce you to my nan, as she would think you are a darling! ... a fantastic drinking/toilet buddy!...' ----Genie
  • 'he's a pervert,' ---ReddyFreddy
  • 'There is a theory which states that if anyone ever understands what 2legs says or discovers why he is here, 2legs will instantly dissappear and be replaced by something even more bizarre and inexplicable. There is another which states that this has already happened.' ----Clive the Flying Ostrach
  • 'I love 2legs! blush' --magwitch
  • 'What's that? The Hootooanarian 2Legs? erm blush I love 'im!' ---Footbacon
  • 'I love 2legs 2 smooch' ---Tefkat
  • 'My badger loves 2legs even if my needles don't' ---Granny Weatherwax
  • 'I dont really know 2legs that well, but I'm sure I'll love him anyway.' ---Bulletproof Cupid~
  • 'I wanna love him and hug him and squeeze him and call him George loveblush' ----Mrs Bojangles
  • 'Not well acquainted with him enough thus far but all in all he appears rather a jolly good egg.Total tart, of course..' ---Cloud
  • 'A tart, a slapper, a hussy, a fishwife, a beagle...' ---Roymondo
  • 'ees lovely e is! An absolutely adorable bloke! Totally bonkers, mind, but still a sweetie. kiss' --Beatrice
  • 'Here's to 2legs: Friend of badgers, enemy of inattentive bicyclists rounding his street corner.' ---Count Zero
  • 'I almost sometimes don't mind 2legs..... much...' ---Reddyfreddy
  • 'I'm admitting nothing until I see this (in)famous thong!' ---Thatprat
  • 'I love 2legs too.. That carbunkle on the face of HooToo that he is...' ---SWL

Here on HooToo


All hail

The might of the Glowing Pickle

Recently updated badgers then?

page about forthcoming Meets A649299A728967U1243703 Is this account from where London meets are organised.

I blame 2legs for . . .

I Survived Single Sign-on

smiley - sheepIsmiley - sheep

smiley - spaceI Support the Committee - H2G2 After The BBC -smiley - spaceThe H2G2 Support Society

UnOfficial h2g2 Lurker



Fight the cause
Search, and search again
Help find the diety
The prophet
The one mighty prophet
The prophet nighthoover, son of Bob
the true ruler of the small space at the back of pieces of furniture, created as a result of the skirting board being proud of the wall by half an inch, therefore having the consequence of preventing furniture, such as wall units, from sitting flush with the wall, and the place where the dust does collect, and which only nighthoover can render Nighthooverly and nighthooverable in its being
Come pay reverence to nighthoover, the prophet, the mighty one, the most Hooverly of beings, and join in the search for the prophet, and campaign for a nighthoover smiley at The nighthoover Shrine


everybody do the Hoover, yeah, everybody do the Hoover yeah, everybody do the hoover, like we did last year zoom

take the nozzel man, contact the floor, cause we doing the hoover, the floor won't be dirty no more,

do the hoover, yeah, do the Hoover oh yeah, we goina hoover man like you never seen before,

Day light dazzel, sun too right, we goina hoover man; all through the night,

do the hoover man, do the hoover now, suck it all up into the electric dust-cow,

everybody do the Hoover, yeah, everybody do the Hoover yeah, everybody do the hoover, like we did last year zoom

night time falls, but between the walls, the carpet covered floor, hoover zoom zoom zoom zoom zoom zoom zoom zoom i'm goina hoover in my room

Lettuce spry mhrrly so

Microbes Deserve Recognition!

Please mind the gap 10

I'm a Queen Fan!!

I have found true happieness in being allowed to have my very own adopted smokable hash-fish called Ganja!; Which I was grateful for being given by Tummyfish Here he is:: Ganja::

smiley - hsif

badger! n i g h t h o o v e r


Email; mark (dot) Faben (at) Gmail (dot) com

My Web site Accessibility testing Or, my more interesting site which is My music site

1Albert Einstein2 Arthur C. Clarke 3George Bataille4Frank Zappa5A5140456U2242337 Sadly, the majority of the tongs had to ultimately be gotten rid of, they were getting a little bit old... 8George Bataille9 P.G. Wodehouse 10 rambling fruit cake wimbles mhrily over laws a shuddered mhriley with manafold incarnations of laminated kitchen countertops made in Spain

2legs - Hey, babe, take a walk on the wild side...

Researcher U169793

Community Editor
Former AViator
Former Communicator
Former Moderator


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