Agony Aunt
Created | Updated Jun 22, 2003
After reading the fora, it's obvious we have problems. But these are not the normal sort of problems for the normal sort of Agony Aunt. So we didn't get a normal Agony Aunt.
Problem Number One
Dear Agony Aunt,
Isn't irrational jealousy a terrible thing? I do so need your advice
... My boss at work is so jealous of the time I'm spending with h2g2.
He used to be so understanding about my little addictions... especially when he didn't know about it, but lately he's been making all sorts ofexcuses to keep me away from my beloved h2g2. He wants me to work ... hekeeps interrupting me, and giving me things to do. Why can't he understand? What am I to do?
Deprived and Depressed
Dear Deprived and Depressed,
It is terrible how some people just do not understand the harm they are causing by not allowing us to freely visit our much needed h2g2. Maybe you can explain to your boss, in a calm and rational way, just what the benefits of your time on h2g2 are when it comes to him. Possibly explain just how the lovely goo's ever-so-peaceful atmosphere keeps you from thinking that 'they' are out there and that 'they' must be destroyed and that 'they' are inhabiting your bosses body. Explain to this dear man that if you were not to have your hourly dose of h2g2 then he might find himself suddenly catapulted into the nearest bowl of green jello where you would then attempt to drive 'them' out by means which due to young ears are best left to the imagination.
If this doesn't seem to convince him that he should allow you to spend as much time as you feel you need wandering h2g2 then you could always sign him up as a newbie and I am sure that within no time Marv will convert him into the Church of the True Brownie where he will find himself so busy trying to figure out this weeks dilemma that he will not have time to notice whether you are working or enjoying a dose of h2g2.
AA
Problem Number Two
Dear AA,
Well, I've always had lots of trouble figuring out women. Could you
explain them to me? LOL Hold on, I'll need some more asprin. Just kidding!
Lost
Dear Lost,
Figuring out women you say? That could take quite a bit of explaining
;-). See, the trouble with women is that it is our job to keep the males of this planet on their toes and always a touch on the confused side. Once you do begin to figure us out, we are quite skilled at mentally conversing with the other females of our planet and coming up with a whole new set of rules and guidelines. This keeps the balance between men and women in check... by balance I mean it keeps the women one step ahead ;-).
Oh, and not to mention the fact that watching the confused dazed looks on the faces of all the men is quite a bit of fun too ;-).
P.S. And asprin is cheating ;-)
If you have an unusual problem that you would like our unusual Agony Aunt to help you with, them please mail Agony Aunt direct!
