The Date (UG)

1 Conversation

Official UnderGuide Entry

Bzzzz. Ouch!! She winced. She hadn't imagined it to be quite so painful. Bzzzz. Ouch! She grit her teeth. It had to be done. Bzzzz. The epilator went steadily on. To distract herself from her pain she closed her eyes and thought of her date. She saw his face in front of her. Ouch, ouch, ouch! Bad mistake to close her eyes without stopping the epilator. Careful not to close her eyes again, she thought of his smiling face.

She would see him today! It had been ages since she had seen him, so she was really looking forward to it. Living and working far away as he did, moments like the one today were rare, and she wanted to be well prepared.

She had started by tidying the living room. She had no idea just how she always managed to end up with such a messy room, despite all her intentions of keeping it tidy. She had fluffed up the cushions, draping them in an advantageous position. Once that was finished, she had dyed her hair auburn because she knew he liked that colour. While the dye worked its magic, she had done the hoovering. Shower afterwards, doing a complete body peeling.

Bzzzz. Nearly finished now, but tears of pain were running down her cheeks. Just as well that she hadn't applied the make-up yet. It said 'waterproof', but was it 'tearproof'? She didn't really believe all the promises of the cosmetics industry, but now that her age started to show she no longer had the luxury of discarding them all without at least trying the lotions and potions. Phew, that was all the superfluous hair removed. She applied a cooling lotion. She got up and started with the make-up.

First the concealer for the baggy under-eye area. Not that it would actually conceal her age, but as long as she avoided direct light shining into her face, it would be OK. Bronzing powder and rouge came next, then two shades of eye-shadow. She managed to poke herself in the eye with the eyeliner. Drat! Now careful with the mascara, so as not to smear it around her eyes. She put her glasses on and had a critical look at her reflection in the mirror. Yes, nearly perfect. Now just some lipstick and gloss, a hint of Chanel No. 5 in the appropriate places, and she was ready to go.
Well, not quite. What to wear? She went for something slinky, with a collar to hide her throat. Perfect. A last quick glance in the mirror to check for lipstick on her teeth. When she came into the living room, he was already waiting for her.

She moved the chair slightly, so she could look him directly into the face and vice versa. She sat down, chest out, tummy in, and took a deep breath.

She started the webcam and gave him a broad smile.... And then her PC crashed quite spectacularly. Suddenly, the screen showed all colours, followed by a completely black screen. A box popped up saying:

The server encountered an external error or misconfiguration and was unable to complete your request.

The hardware you have inflicted on the system has not passed Windows' Quality testing.

Continuing may impair or destabilize the correct operation of your system either immediately, or in the future.

Microsoft strongly recommends that you go and wash your face!

Bookmark on your Personal Space


Entry

A50500892

Infinite Improbability Drive

Infinite Improbability Drive

Read a random Edited Entry


References

h2g2 Entries

Disclaimer

h2g2 is created by h2g2's users, who are members of the public. The views expressed are theirs and unless specifically stated are not those of the Not Panicking Ltd. Unlike Edited Entries, Entries have not been checked by an Editor. If you consider any Entry to be in breach of the site's House Rules, please register a complaint. For any other comments, please visit the Feedback page.

Write an Entry

"The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is a wholly remarkable book. It has been compiled and recompiled many times and under many different editorships. It contains contributions from countless numbers of travellers and researchers."

Write an entry
Read more