A Muse On Bottled Beer - The Saints

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The Saints smiley - angel

Timothy Taylor's Landlord Bitter is by far and away the finest beer on God's litttle green smiley - earth Brewed and bottled in the Yorkshire (God's favourite county, whilst we're on the subject His preferences) town of Keighley. Don't take just my word for it, this beer has won the CAMRA1 award for best ale more times than any other British brewsmiley - smiley

It is a light coloured ale of the India Pale Ale variety, very smooth in texture with a pronounced and complex hoppy bitterness. It is available in draught form, but sadly that variety is rarely seen outside of Yorkshire. This is mainly because demand is so great that the local Yorkshire market takes all the supplies, and because naturally enough the brewery wants to keep a close check on the quality of the pub's cellars.

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Budweiser Budvar is an example of a true and pure lager made in the proper centuries old Bohemian tradition (and made in Bohemia to boot). It is a very crisp and refreshing lager, made slowly to allow the flavours to reach a peak of maturity. This is said to be in stark contrast to another well know "beer" with a similar name smiley - winkeye

Gently, since the Velvet Revolution of 1989 when Czechoslovakia threw off the yoke Stalinism and became a liberal democracy, this fine beer has become more widely available across the world. This has caused major upsets with the makers of another beer called "Budweiser", but I am happy to report that in most disputes between this Czech minnow and an American multinational, the little Czechs win.

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The best brewery in Lincolnshire is the family owned business of Batemans of Wainfleet. And their finest, and I mean their very finest, beer is XXXB (pronounced 'Triple Ex Bee'). This is light and refreshing beer brewed to some 4.8% abv with loads of hops and great barley malts in it.

The brewery was nearly lost in the 1980s when it was the subject of an aggressive takeover bid. Fortunately this was fought off with the help and support of beer drinkers from all over the country, and XXXB survives to this day. And over the years it has garnered many many awards from CAMRA and others for the quality of its beer brewing smiley - cheers

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The Black Sheep Brewery of Masham in North Yorkshire produce a mighty fine ale celebrating their moorland heritage by the name of Riggwelter, the strongest in a quality selection of beers2from this small independant brewery.

The name Riggwelter comes from the old Norse; rygg - back and velte - to overturn. So if a sheep is overturned and can't get up again, it is said by the local dalesfolk to be riggwelted. And that is exactly what you will be if you drink to much of this 5.7% crackersmiley - bigeyes The beer is a dark malty drink with a complex palate, a distinct aroma of coffee and of the famous Goldings hops used in its production.

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Pilsner Urquell is the number two beer in the Czech Republic after the aforementioned Budvar, and like its competitor it is also brewed in the town of Plzen3. It too uses the traditional Bohemian lagering technique of slow brewing to produce a fine drink, but it comes up with very different results.

For those only interested in getting pissed, its not as strong as Budvar at only 4.4%. However that isn't really the story. The true difference is in the flavour which is very bitter due to the large quantity of native styrian hops that are included in the brewing process. So bitter is this drink in fact, that it would totally surprise a drinker of standard UK lagers. In truth it tastes more like a bitter ale than a leger, so is the perfect drink to encourage 'real ale' drinkers to branch out and try something new.

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Belgium has a tough time of it in this world of ours. I mean it keeps getting invaded whenever some other European power decides to have a punch up; it has two competing languages that don't like each other; it isn't as cool as Holland and it is rubbish at football!

However it does have one redeeming feature and that is the quality and diversity of its beers. And high up on this list of fine beers the country brews4 is Chimaysmiley - smiley

Chimay is brewed by genuine monks in the genuine monastry of Scourmont Abbey in South West Belgium. There they run a thriving little business brewing beer, making cheese and generally fleecing tourists. They make three different beers at the abbey, a Premiere with a red label at 7% abv; a Tripple or white label at 8% abv; and a Grande Reserve with a blue label and brewed to an eye watering 9% abv!

All three beers are top fermented beers which then go through a secondary fermentation in the bottle - be warned this secondary fermantation throws a yeast deposit at the bottom of the bottle, so a little care is needed when pouring the beer. Of the three by far and away the best is the Premiere which is also the darkest of the three and most bitter, so closest in taste to many English ales.

The Tripple is the lightest in colour and is brewed with raisans in the mix, so has a very sweet flavour. The Grand Reserve has been so over worked to get to the 9% strength that much of the sublty of the flavour has been forced out, however if you do get the chance to buy it in it's 150cl form (yes, that is One and a half litres of beer in one bottle!) then do so. Firstly because it'll leave you blotto for the evening, but more importantly the beer for some reason ages much better in the big bottle, so you'll get a better impression of what this beer could be.

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Worthington's White Shield is the original India Pale Ale, brewed for export to the overheated Englishmen running the empire in India. To deal with the long journey the beer is brewed strong (5.6% alcohol) and carries on brewing inside the bottle. This means that the beer has a sediment in it, so pouring the ale needs a little care to get a clear glass of ale. However amongst the connoisseurs this sediment is the treat at the end of the drink to be knocked back in one from the bottle.

White Shield has had its rough times in recent years. A classic bottle brewed ale didn't fit into the modern "nitrokeg smooth cool and sophisticated, lets feed the punters absolute shite in a glass and make them love us" brand image and was discontinued in the late 1990s. Fortunately the brewers King & Barnes came to the rescue and revived the brew under licence as a niche market beer. Since then production has moved again to The Museum Brewing Company based in the original home of IPA, Burton upon Trent, where the brand has flourished and sales of this classic go from strength to strength.

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Badger Brewery's Blandford Fly is a strange sort of brew. It would be a fairly mild tasting and rather non descript ale if it weren't for the fact that it is spiced with root ginger5. This makes it a superbly refreshing drink when served really cold. Its so nice in fact, that I'm actually drinking a bottle as I type these very words. The only problem, its very poerful at 5.2% alcol so my typng is becmng irrrratick smiley - cheers

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Exmoor Ales' Exmoor Gold is a mighty fine, strong ale brewed in the small Exmoor town of Wiveliscombe, which happens to be just over the hills from where I was brought up. Sadly when I was a youngster the brewery was very small and didn't supply my town. Now the brewery has expanded both its range of beers and volume of supply, so its much easier to find (Try Tesco smiley - winkeye). But still maintains its fiercely guarded independence and dedication to the traditions of the brewers craft.

Oh and the bottles come with a mighty fine picture of a Red Deer stag's head and antlers. Images of which are as ubiquitous around Exmoor as the Kangaroo is in Australia.

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Youngs' Double Chocolate is a very dark ruby coloured stout with a thick and creamy head to it, brewed in the traditional style at their Wandsworth brewery. The beer has real melted chocolate added during the brewing process which gives it its colour and a wonderful (and strong) chocolatey aroma. Be warned though, it slips down way too easily and at 5.0% you can quickly find your self having one (or three) too many smiley - online2long

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Crazy Ed's Cave Creek Chili Beer a true original. Brewed as the armed response to the woosey fashion of sticking a bit of lime into the neck of bottle of crap Mexican beer. This has a hot serrano chili pepper stuck in it instead. The fruit blows up when you open the bottle sending pungent bubbles of beer everywhere. Drink it ice cold with all manner of spicy foods.

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Greene King's Abbot Ale is the finest beer from the (frankly odd) county of Suffolk. Whilst widely available in a draft form in that county and other areas around East Anglia and the counties just to the north of London, it is only found in bottles for the rest of us. Now don't be disheartened, the bottled version is a true reflection of the draft beer and is a fine and upstanding ale all in its own right. The beer has a mid coloured amber hue and light hoppy aroma. The head, like all good ales, is tight beaded and lasting. The taste is smooth and full of fruit and then the hops come bursting through smiley - smiley

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Once again Youngs of Wandsworth come up with the goods with their marvellous contribution of Triple 'A' beer. Its a delicious and refreshing ale especially when served cool on a warm summers evening (like the one I've just had smiley - smiley). The beer is very light in texture but comes with a sweet zesty aroma of hops that lasts right through to the finish. Marvellous.

One feature of the beer that had me a little bemused is that the wonderful hops that contribute so much to this drink come from America. Now what are our Transatlantic cousins doing with such fine hops? And why can't they find a use for them in their own beers, rather than producing muck like Budweiser or Millersmiley - huh

*shrugs* Ho-hum....

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Peroni's Nastro Azzurro is the premier beer in the Italian market. It is a nice clean crisp lager with some subtle bitter undertones and goes wonderfully well with pasta and all manner italian dishes. Brewed to 5.2% alcohol, and with its new and funky label, it makes a great addition to anyone's store cupboard smiley - ok

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Beck's is only ever brewed in Bremen Germany, as the advertising never ever ever tires of telling us...... (smiley - sleepy). Actually before you get bored and wander off, that fact is a good thing. It means that the beer is subject to the German beer purity laws of 1516 which state that beer can only be made from "barley, yeast, hops and water" and nothing else6, which in my opinion is pretty darn good thing and a great way of keeping a lot of substandard beers (and I can think of one beginning with "Bud..." smiley - tongueout) off of the German market.

The beer comes brewed to 5.0% in its little green bottle with the distinctive green & red label and crinkly silver foil around the bottle's neck. The beer is somewhat unusual in that it comes in a 275ml bottle as standard. Now I can't think of any other beer in that bottle size - 250ml, 330ml, 500ml, one pint, even 660ml - plenty of them, but not at 275ml smiley - huh

The brew itself is clean, crisp and delicious, indeed its everything you've come to expct from a fine German lager. It really can't be faulted at all, with just one little little exception. Price. Your ½ pint bottle of Beck's will set you back as much as a full pint of draft beer in a British pub. Its still worth it even at those price levels from time to time if you feel like showing off.

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If you want to know what hops smell like, then can I suggest you try a bottle of Marston's Late Hopped ale. The beer itself is no great shakes, but the blast of aroma you get when you pop the cap off of the bottle is quite amazing smiley - wow

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And would you believe it, Marston's have come up trumps again just a few months after their Late Hopped ale with a rather smashing new brew by the name of Firestoker7. This little cracker is one designed and developed in-house by the brew masters to fill a niche market and encourage new drinkers to real ale. The beer comes with a lovely cherry and vanilla flavour to it, excellent hops as you would expect with all Marston's beers and an overall refreshing experience.

Definitely worth checking out if you want my opinion smiley - ok

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Well, well this bit of the entry does seem to be turning into the Marston's fanclub and appreciation society. For no sooner do I find a second fine brew worthy of praise, then along comes a third smiley - wow

This time it is a strong and robust ale by the name of Strong Pale Ale. The company have gone back into their archives to look at the history of their beers and have pulled this one from the dusty shelves and revitalised it. The original recipe dates back to before the First World War when beer was brewed much stronger, there was a pub on every corner, and beer formed an integral part of everyone's diet8.

The beer comes in at a whopping 6.2% abv which is nearly 25% stronger than even the so called "premium beers" of today. It's brewed with the outstanding Maris Otter barley, integral to so many fine beers of the past. And with Fuggles and Goldings hops for flavour and aroma. But be warned, this golden brew slips down so easily, you might well find your time in the pub shortened because you've suddenly come over all completely smashed smiley - drunk

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Harviestoun Brewery's Bitter & Twisted is a cracking little ale from a tiny tiny brewery in Clackmannanshire, Scotland. The ale is pale straw colour, much paler then than most of the beers reviewed here. It's also bottled with substantially less CO2 than normal so the beer is less gassy than many, and is hence more comfortable to drink. The beer itself has a complex blend of hops to give it a superb balance and oodles of bitterness. Absolutely delicious smiley - smiley

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It is to my great surprise that I find myself including a mainstream Scottish brewery in this list of Saints. I say a surprise as Scotland is best known as the home of the keg beer, a dead and awful ale that just sits in barrels in pubs and gets poured. No skill involved, no brewmaster required, no taste included...

Well this beer McEwans No.1 Champion Ale from the stable of the major brewer Scottish & Newcastle. It is a formidable ale brewed to a whopping 7.3% alcohol, yet in the process of super charging this drink they haven't scrificed taste, smell , bitterness and texture. It's got all of those in spades, really wonderful stuff. Long may it continue smiley - smiley

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Up north there is a chain of cheap and cheerful supermarkets by the name of Morrisons which started from a grocers shop in Bradford way back in 1899. One of the products they stocked was a weird beer called "Euro Lager". It came in smaller Coca-Cola sized cans with lots and lots of Euro logos all over them. The beer was really weak at only 2.7% alcohol and frankly didn't taste of much, but at only £1.99 for a six pack, it was as cheap as chips.

Well my mates and I would buy it by the car load and sit around chewing the fat and generally having a good time. Then at the end of the night the whole room would be awash with these funny little cans, and we would all be comfortably numb having discussed how we were to put the world to rights. Thats why this beer is in the "Saints" section - happy memories smiley - smiley

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Click below for the other Beery Musings smiley - cheers


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1CAMRA is The Campaign for Real Ale. A British group dedicated to defending traditional ales against the crushing might of the multinational brewing companies. Boo Hiss! 2Apparently they made a beer to celebrate 30 years of Monty Python, which was said to be specially tempered over burning witches.3My my, a pub crawl in THAT town would be something to write home about smiley - bigeyes4 Well high up on my list anyway, and as I'm the author around here, I can say what ever I damn well like. So Yah-Boo-Sucks to you smiley - monster5I've just discovered another of this company's fine flavoured ales by the name of Golden Glory, which comes flavoured with peach blossom. Yum yum smiley - bigeyes6To be fair this only strictly applies to bottom fermented beers. Top fermented beers can use other grains such as rye and wheat. But the principle remains the same vis this is the first ever piece of comsumer protection legistlation smiley - ok7Click on the article title for more details.8The water supply to the Working Classes wasn't that great in those days you see, so beer was a better way of getting liquid into you.

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