We're not sure if the devil made them do it, but these were all really bad ideas.

How did these bad ideas work out? Well, we'll tell you. . .

1. This 'energy drink' was invented in 1959 by the felicitously-named Dr. DeForest C. Jarvis. Its mixture of honey and apple cider vinegar is said to be healthy, but hardly anybody enjoyed the taste. What's it called? Honegar
2. Possibly the most irritating 'feature' ever invented by Microsoft Word, this chirpy little paperclip offered to 'help' you write a letter whenever you typed the word 'dear'. Users made ominous references to Sirius Cybernetics. What was the nuisance's name? Clippy
3. Want to find out where the enemy is hiding? Kill all the trees. This product had deadly effect. What was it called? Agent Orange
4. The Soviets caused the panic over this food additive in 1976. So the less-colourful M&M bags were a Commie plot. (We knew it!) What was this stuff that either did, or maybe did not, cause cancer? Red Dye #2
5. Franz Reichelt, inventor had the Worst Idea Ever in 1912. He jumped off the Eiffel Tower wearing his latest invention, and they ended up measuring how deep a hole he made. What was this thing? Parachute jacket See it in inaction in this video. We think it was a shame to lose such a magnificent moustache.
6. Modern iPhone users who loathe those dirty fingerprints on their screen could buy these wonderful inventions for only 10 euros. By what clever name are they called? Phone Fingers What else?
7. This electronic 'pet' was supposed to teach children responsibility. At least, that's what we figure. But your 'pet' would 'die' if you didn't 'feed' it. This brilliant scam was a Japanese invention. What did they call this, besides 'worse than a pet rock'? Tamagotchi It should have been called 'Tama-gotcha'.
8. Not content with tormenting its users with that paperclip, Microsoft invented Microsoft Bob. Buyers stayed away in droves. What horrible legacy did Microsoft Bob leave us on our font menu? Comic sans
9. In 2008, New York City installed its first pay toilets. For 25 cents, a patron could use the toilet for 15 minutes. What happened when the 15 minutes were up? The doors opened
10. In 1973, Henry Smolinski and a foolhardy passenger crashed and died in the test flight of a 'flying car'. What two elements did Smolinski combine to make this unsuccessful vehicle? A Cessna Skymaster and a Ford Pinto

Let this be a lesson to you: study your history before you call the Marketing Department. The reputation you save may be your own. And never try to fly a Pinto.

Dmitri Gheorgheni

24.04.17 Front Page

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