Here's where we test your news savvy.

Remember, all this happened in the first seven days of June. Can you imagine how weird this planet really is? Makes you want to send more Entries to the Edited Guide. 'Mostly Harmless', my eye.

1. Airbnb stays can be full of surprises. What did a family visiting Capetown, South Africa, find one morning?
   
   • Baboons raiding the kitchen. (Thugs.)
2. A liquor store in Southern California suffered extensive damage to its stock. What happened?
   
   • A marauding peahen destroyed wine and champagne while dodging animal control. (Watch the exciting footage.)
3. Generous Parents Division: what did a Philadelphia mother spend $25,000 on?
   
   • Three tons of sand and a camel for her son's prom photos. (They couldn't go to Dubai this year.)
4. In a Massachusetts medical dispensary, you can buy an unusual food item. What is it?
   
   • A marijuana-laced pizza. (Now you can both have and cure the munchies. Way to go! A six-inch pizza costs $38, and you have to add your own toppings, according to factcheck authority snopes.com.)
5. What is a Japanese shop selling for cats and dogs?
   
   • Samurai armour. (No comment. Really.)
6. A bear broke into a Colorado home while the owner was away. Besides raiding her fridge, what did the bear get caught on camera doing?
   
   • Playing her piano. (Due to lack of sound on the security camera, we can only guess that he was playing 'The Teddy Bears' Picnic'.)
7. A Los Angeles area bakery was temporarily closed when a video went viral showing a happy rat in their display window. What did the bakery blame for the health hazard?
   
   • There was a 'structural malfunction'. (Is this a fancy way of saying, 'There was a hole in the wall'?)
8. What unpleasant surprise did a Georgia (USA) driver find when he stopped to refuel at a petrol station?
   
   • There was a four-foot snake in the pump handle. (Amazingly, another customer handled it quickly. He recognised a rat snake when he saw one.)
9. An antique dealer in eastern Pennsylvania got a shock when he opened his door to find, not his dog, but an overfriendly bear. How did he respond?
   
   • He punched it in the nose. (Bucks County Animal Control have a history with this bear. After frightening the antiques dealer, it moved over to nearby Feasterville and roamed around the Kmart. Animal control officers chased him outside, and managed to shoot him with a tranquiliser dart as he ran up a tree. Whereupon he promptly fell asleep – in the tree. Upon waking, the aggravated bear climbed an even taller tree. Bear 2, Humans 1, so far.)
10. Switzerland's largest adult education institution, the Migros Club School, has a big hit with its latest course offering. What is it?
    
    • Introductory Klingon. (And all the Swiss Misses say, 'Qa-pla'!')

This quiz should teach you something, besides 'watch out for bears'. You can't possibly know everything that goes on in the world. There's such a thing as TMI (Too Much Information). Remember to turn off the TV or computer and go outside sometimes. The baby chipmunks under the porch need watching. And who knows? There might be a bear on Main Street again.

Dmitri Gheorgheni

26.06.17 Front Page

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