Alabaster House Journal

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Someone holding a green flag with lots of people on it (Republic)

Shredded Toilet Paper and Damping Off

I want to apologize to those of you who have used the Alabaster House toilets during the last couple of weeks. As you know, we have tried to keep Alabaster House homey and unintimidating. We want you to feel like you're visiting a friend's home – not a hallowed public edifice. So, the institutional fixtures found in most public buildings were replaced with something friendlier. It seemed like a good idea at the time.

Enter Minerva McGonagall, Alabaster House cat. Minerva is a dear little thing. She is intelligent and inquisitive, as a cat should be. She is also extremely friendly and has no objections to accompanying our visitors and staff to the canteen for a handout or out to the gardens for a bit of exercise. She keeps guests company in the library, where she is always willing to occupy their laps while they sit and quietly read. She can often be found on house guest's beds warming their feet on a cold night and helping them dress in the mornings.

The problem arose when Minerva decided to conduct an experiment for Hootoo U. The question was how many AH bathrooms can one cat invade in one day? She gladly undertook the task, but soon realized that it would be necessary for her to leave behind a clue of some sort so she could prove she was actually there. She decided that shredding toilet paper was the answer.

At first she limited herself to a few of the top sheets on the roll. This was a bit annoying, but not terribly wasteful. Then she really got into it. We began finding complete rolls of toilet paper in the floor in artistic piles. She soon bored of this and began dragging them throughout Alabaster House. Last week she managed to demolish an entire month's worth of paper supplies. We are adding the paper to the compost pile, but even so, it is becoming expensive.

When confronted about her new hobby, Minerva blamed the dog. She's already a politician.

The Presidential vegetable garden is being planned. We started some seedlings to set out for the early spring vegetables but have had trouble with damping off. We will have to be reseeded. The unusual weather patterns have played havoc with our planting schedule. The garden will be a bit late this season as a result.

The good news is that the later planting dates will result in having lots of fresh vegetables for the Presidential Meet in July. The bad news is that Minerva wants to help in the garden.

The Presidential Meet information and sign-up page

The h2g2 Presidential Election 2005 Archive

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