Robert Rankin

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'Magus to the Hermetic Order of the Golden Sprout, 12th Dan Master of Dimac, poet, adventurer, swordsman and concert pianist; big game hunter and Best Dressed Man of 1933; mountaineer, lone yachtsman, Shakespearean Actor and topless go-go dancer; Robert Rankin's hobbies include passive smoking, communicating with the Dead and lying about his own achievements.'

In style, his writing is a cross between Douglas Adams and Terry Pratchett, and seems to be influenced by either cannabis, or cider, or both. If you like either of them1 then you will absolutely love his books. They are full of fantastically devious and twisting plots, running gags, urban myths, in-jokes and one liners. They are also incredibly inventive, and original. Among his many creations are Neville the Part Time Bar Man, John O'Mally and Jim Poole, Colin the Super-Dense Proto-Hippie, and Hugo Rune2. He is also the first person ever to write a book with a soundtrack3.

He has written a quintet of a size to rival a Douglas Adams trilogy 4, as well as many other novels, most of which seem to show a remarkable favouritism towards Brentford5.



Below is the list of his published works to date. As you can see, he is quite prolific, but most people agree that the trilogy and the quintet are his best. For people who haven't read any of his work before, the best advise is to try and start with either of these groups.
  • The6Brentford Quintet, which comprises:
    • The Antipope, 1992, Corgi
    • The Brentford Triangle
    • East of Ealing
    • The Sprouts of Wrath
    • The Brentford Chain-store Massacre, 1997, Doubleday
  • The Armageddon trilogy, which comprises:
    • Armageddon - The Musical
    • Armageddon Two - The B-Movie: They Came And Ate Us
    • Armageddon Three - The Remake: The Suburban Book Of The Dead
  • The Book of Ultimate Truths
  • Raiders of the Lost Car Park
  • The Most Amazing Man Who Ever Lived, 1995, Corgi
  • The Greatest Show Off Earth
  • The Garden Of Unearthly Delights
  • A Dog Called Demolition, 1996, Bantam Press
  • Nostrodamus ate my Hampster, 1996, Doubleday
  • Sprout Mask Replica, 1997, Doubleday
  • The Dance of the Voodoo Handbag, 1998, Doubleday
  • Apocalipso, 1998, Doubleday
  • Snuff Fiction, 1999, Doubleday
  • Sex and Drugs and Sausage Rolls, 1999, Doubleday
(I hope to soon get reviews of all the above, as well as ISBN numbers.)

What to do if you meet a fan of Robert Rankin



These people are quite easy to spot, if you know what to look for. General signs include:
  • Being in possession of a badge bearing an insignia that appears to be a cross between a UFO and a CND7 sign.
  • Looking apprehensive at 20 minutes past or 20 minutes to the hour.
  • Having a bandaged left leg, of which they are overly protective.
  • Smirking whenever the Rotary club is mentioned.
  • Having an undue respect for pubs called The Flying Swan, and Brentford in general8

The best thing to do is be nice. You cannot hope to bluff your way through, and they are well known for being friendly, if somewhat paranoid.

This entry is written with credit to WowbaggerTIP, who I have 'borrowed heavily from'9. Sorry10 ;-)

1The authors, that is ;-)
Even just slightly...
2The Great Philosopher.3The Dance of the Voodoo Handbag.4Five books and counting...5Which he considers (and has, indeed, proven) to be at the centre of the universe.6By now legendary...7Campaign for Nuclear Disarmament. For those too young to remember, the symbol is a bit like an upside down 'Y' inside a circle, with a bar between the angled bits.8See foot note number four. 9PR speak for plagiarised ;-)10Well anyway, he didn't know how to get sub-lists, so my entry is better.

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