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The Lottery

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Two paths exist for those who wish to be independently wealthy:

  • You may follow the road of hard work and determination, and this mixed with a little luck over a period of time may lead you to achieving your financial dreams.

  • You may walk around hoping to find a large box of money.

The lottery is a government-sanctioned version of the latter method, offering participants a chance to randomly win a prize. Unlike Shirley Jackson's short story The Lottery (1948, later made into a film), the winner of most state lotteries will not be stoned to death as their reward.

Most lotteries select several numbers from a vastly larger pool of numbers, thus creating one winning combination out of several million possibilities. The lucky person or persons who had previously selected or randomly purchased this winning combination will then be awarded a new life of wealth and success, ranging from 'new car' wealthy to 'new sovereign of several island states' wealthy.

All losing ticket holders curse themselves for playing in the first place and vow not to repeat the process, until the next drawing.

It should be noted that the lottery can be viewed as a tax on people who are bad at maths. Most money invested in lottery tickets would be better placed at the bottom of a large hole in the backyard, which could then be dug up when additional cash was needed in the future. Even at this 0% rate of return, a larger profit would be made than the average return from playing the lottery.

Zen Guide to Picking Lottery Numbers for Ultimate Happiness

There are various published methods, websites and other media concerning ways of positively enhancing your wealth by selecting numbers to play for your next local big lottery. Without doubt, the worst and least reliable of these is to rely on 'Mystic Meg', an 'advisor' appearing on the UK lottery TV show who doubles up as an astrologer.

Another way to wealth is to create such media, in the hope of generating revenues through its sales.

At no charge, the following guidelines are provided to help in improving your wealth and ultimate happiness through the selection of random numbers. The following takes the example of the 6/49 type lottery; ie pick six numbers from 1 to 49, whereby the more that match the more you win:

  • A legitimate lottery is based on the selection of a truly random set of numbers. This is supposedly controlled by some authority and would hopefully prevent the privileged from affecting results in their favour. In this respect, it is impossible for anyone to predict the next draw - unless they have divine, infallible visionary abilities, or are crooked and the system flawed.

  • The money spent on buying a lottery ticket will naturally bring you unlikely returns on your investment, in order for the lottery to survive. The time you spend picking your lottery numbers could also be profitably spent in other activities - unless you find great pleasure in picking these numbers. Otherwise that time could be spent pursuing what you consider happiness, fulfilment, or profitable - for example, trading speculative Internet stocks.

  • To save time on picking numbers, some lotteries allow you to let them choose a random number for you. Take this option as it requires no effort from you. Unless of course the company responsible has implemented a scheme to eliminate those numbers once the unfortunate pick them. Whatever number you pick has as much a chance as any other.

  • Failing that pick, any other will do - for example the last draw's numbers. There is as much chance of the same numbers coming up as any other. Note however that the chance of the same number coming up in two consecutive draws is very small - but this is not the same thing. Past history will not affect the future draw. This is the same as picking the same numbers every draw - your favourite numbers.

  • Have your child count the numbers out for you - 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6. They have just as much chance as any other.

  • Pick whatever numbers you want, for the sheer entertainment value.

  • Spend your money on something else, beer for example or a DVD re-release of Bucks Fizz1 videos or French cheese...

If you are not convinced of the unlikeliness of winning, try playing the 'virtual lottery'. Pick your numbers, but do not buy a ticket. Watch the relevant TV show or newspaper every week for a year or so, and see if you would have actually won anything. You almost certainly will have saved plenty of money, and can feel free to spend it on something luxurious. If you find that your numbers were picked, and if you had bought a ticket you would have won your fortune, please try to avoid taking your anger out on family or co-workers.

1Bucks Fizz were a rather cheesy British pop band who won the Eurovision Song Contest with the catchy number 'Making Your Mind Up'.

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