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Stubbing Your Toe

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Though humans have thousands of fears, from fire to sharks to buttons, one of the most painful things to happen is to stub your toe. Stubbing a toe is so painful that many people have inflicted more damage upon themselves by hopping up and down on one foot after hurting their toe. How does this injury take place, and how can we avoid such distressing experiences?

The Causes of a Toe-Stubbing Incident

You can end up stubbing your toes in a whole number of different circumstances, from the rocky beach to simple office. However, there are usually a number of elements which add up to the likelihood of stubbing your toe.

  • Walking around barefooted or in sandals which expose the toes.

  • Being in an area surrounded by heavy, hard objects (such as rocks, walls, or furniture).

  • Not paying much attention to the surroundings, usually through either being drunk, love struck, sugar-rushed or just plain reckless.

The scenario probably goes something like this. The victim (let's call him Bob - it seems to be conventional) is walking happily along to his destination, the couch. Along his path, the hallway, he passes by an unnoticed object, the coffee table. With considerable force, poor Bob then swings his foot into the coffee table, banging his big toe very hard. At this point Bob panics, jumping on one foot, screaming 'Ow! S**t! Ow! Ow! O!'. Or perhaps the agony is so bad that his mouth opens but nothing comes out, the pain rattling through his head.

Preventing the Accident from Happening

Really, there are four steps to protect yourself from stubbing your toe. They are listed in the order of how desperate an action is needed.

Stop Being Stupid!

Really folks, why are you being so dumb as to not look where you're going! Pay more attention to your surroundings, it will save the pain.

Wear Shoes

The easiest way to stop yourself the toe stub is to wear shoes that protect your toes. Though it's only a thin layer of rubber and cloth, or leather, it can end your suffering.

Really Stop Being Stupid!

Just be really safe. Always watch your step. Is that too much to ask?

Move to the Desert

If you have failed to protect yourself from your own stupidity move to the desert. There you won't have to worry about stubbing your toe, because there is nothing you could possibly stub your toe on.

Worst Case Scenario

The worst case scenario when stubbing a toe is to completely destroy a toe nail.

If you stub your toe quickly enough on a hard enough surface, such as a balance beam in gymnastics, you can take a slice off your toenail at several very painful spots. The closer to the place where it meets your skin, the worse. If this happens, you will suddenly decide to stop standing and just roll around for a moment while you scream your head off. This is a very painful experience!

Trimming your toe nails is the definite, easy way to stop chances of a painful incident like this happening. Your bulky toes should usually exceed the length of the toe nails. If they don't, there are a number of ways in which you could be hurt. If the object is sharp enough, it could slice into the nail and damage the soft spot underneath. If it is hard enough, the toe nail will be lifted off your foot like a lever.

The absolute worst case scenario to happen when stubbing a toe, and this is getting quite extreme now, is that the toenail could be killed at the growing section. If this happens, the toenail may not grow back in certain places, leaving the toe exposed, allowing it to be easily cut and infected. Not very nice at all.

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