The Lamentation of Job (I)

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The Lamentation of Job (I)

'Why have you done this to me? Why? Why? Why?'

After a few agonised seconds, the voice went on.

'Have I not served you loyally, all these years? Have I not done everything you commanded of me!?! Yet you've destroyed my family, my world and now my own flesh!
What more do you want of me!?!' The voice demanded angrily.
'You've made my life a misery and still expect 'gratitude' from me because I'm not dead yet! What kind of monster are you? Even the Devil himself wouldn't torture me this way. Lord of all things - including my pain and hatred.

Oh, yes, I loathe you as once I loved you. You were my God. You could do no wrong in my eyes but what right have I done in yours? You've destroyed me. You've crippled me with physical pain and emotional misery. How can any sane man do anything but hate you with every fibre of their being? How can I do anything but treat you with the contempt you've obviously poured on me?'

Suddenly a voice of great majesty and mystery boomed out.

'Oh you foolish mortal! How little you know of me and my works. Who are you to question me and what I do? What knowledge do you have of how Creation works. Who are you really Job? Yet you stand against me, bleating like a little lost lamb. Does this not condemn you as the child you are? The world is rebuilt every day by faith alone. You foolish man - you have become lost in the illusions of this world. It is not the built that matters but the building of reality at every instant of existence.

The man that holds onto wealth and power kills it, crushes it. Like sand running through his fingers, it is gone in a moment. Fear of losing it, washes it from his grasp. Woe to you, you doubter! Your sin is in your heart that you do not believe. You are lost in false pride! Where is the humility of the servant? Where is the joy in serving the greater good, through your fellow men? Lost in selfish self-aggrandisement!

Why do you no longer search for me in the wild places? Am I not God of all things, after all? Do not the trees, the plants, the animals - the very ground itself, praise me with its very existence? Yet you despise me and turn away from my goodness, my bounty for you.'

Suddenly a new voice burst forth, spitting out its deep contempt.

'You would drown your sorrows in the tavern, if you could lower yourself to mix with the other offal of society. You are tempted but won't betray this illusion of false pride, even now. You visit the Temple as a wealthy merchant - no man must accuse you of the vain hypocrite you are, oh no! You think we do not know who you really are, under this festering facade of self-righteousness? You think we do not see how black your heart really is? You spurn those you should be helping, instead falling into my hands because of who and what you are. I am God's prosecutor and you are guilty of error before him.

Have you ever turned any other man from sin, by pouring out your genuine heart to him?'

'I have given to charity.'

'You have thrown worthless coinage into the gutter. Have you ever given yourself, to the hurt, the emotionally lame? Have you given hope to but one, single man?'

Job looked down at the ground shamefacedly.

'No, I thought not. This is your guilt. You've watched your fellows rolling in agony on the ground and walked contemptuously by. The prosecution rests, Lord.'

Another, more gentle voice now spoke forth.

'We are not here to punish you for your sins but to alert you to them. God isn't punishing you. We don't have to punish you for your sins - you are already doing that yourself. God didn't take your family - you let them go. You failed to protect your children, that is all.'

A great wail went up to the heavens. Job realised his error and his pain.

'Oh Job, our heart goes out to you.

You are more than you think you are. It is you who has made yourself ill, with this self-doubt. Your inner turmoil is reflected in your outer symptoms. How can you claim to know God, when you don't even know yourself?

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