... and now ladies, gentlemen and others, please put your hands, paws, fins, goinks¹ together for another Through the Doughnut Hole!!!!

Hey everyone we're on a role...
Sit back and enjoy another edition of Through the Doughnut Hole!!²

What a calamity, due to a mess up with my Personal Assistant Blotto³, two guests were not even invited onto the show last week. So this week I beg your indulgence and please welcome....

[Clip from last weeks show]If you cast your minds back to the show dated 24th April 2003; I asked this important question of you. If you won One Million Pounds on the UK National Lottery, what would you do with the money?

Okay so last week I was in error when I told you there was only one reply by Archangel Dr Justin, when in fact we had two others. So here they are, both in the same conversation. The first
guest is from my good chum Marjin

I think I would grab the money and before they found out I never bought a ticket .

And then try to attend every h2g2 meet until the money is gone or my wife objects, whichever comes first. So after two meets we go on a long world-trip together

What a wonderful idea, attending all the h2g2 meets. I am sure that everyone is as keen to meet you as you are to meet them, and of course to keep your wife happy you can bring her along... that will save you the problem of her objecting, and you missing out on meets to go on
a boring world-trip!!!

My second guest is non other than Doctor MO who had this revelation about the question.

Oh money, money, what to do with so much money that you couldn't really spend it (well you could in this day and age ), to be honest that much money is extremely bad for people, it's a hopeful lazy sort of money that sloshes around in ones bank account, when it could be free, living in millions of wallets. Save The Money! Don't Save!

Oh I think that I could have a jolly good try at spending it ~grin~. Yes I do agree that maybe instead of just being in ones person's pocket the wealth could be spread around a bit, but spread around to thin and it stops being a Million Pounds and becomes just a penny down the back of the sofa!!!

As my P.A. Blotto takes both our guests off to the green room, I'd just like to thank them once again for being so patient in waiting to appear on this show.

Okay, on with this weeks show, and if you remember last week this important question was asked.

My first guest this week, (though to be strictly accurate it is my third guest but who's counting), Is quite a show regular Deus Ex Machina who started this conversation.

To quote Dirk Gently from 'The Salmon of Doubt', 'Odd thing about being a private detective- you spend your time finding out little things about other people that nobody else knows, but then you discover that there all sorts of things that everybody else knows about you, which you don't.' Now I'm no private detective, but I'm sure that many people have little quirks that they don't know they have, especially me. And that is why I'd like to meet myself- to get to know me better.

Or else make myself go crazy by seeing myself at dinner.

Oh, imagine taking yourself out to dinner, all sorts of questions would be raised, not the least who would pay for the dinner at the end of the evening. I muchly suspect that a lot of people would not like to find out those quirks about themselves, or maybe even not recognise
them as our quirks. What do you viewers think about taking yourself out to dinner?

My second guest on this weeks show I think you will recognise, not least for the fact that we have only just met, it is of course, Doctor MO who in the same conversation said....

hmm, Greebo the part 'Animal, vegetable or mineral' that had me in stitches. Thank you, your excellence.

As for me, I've always wanted a dinner date with Cali Lasseia, just to see that boundless joy, and love, (oh and those beautiful wings)

I must admit I had to go searching to find Cali Lasseia Doctor MO, and when I did I have to agree with you, those wings ARE beautiful, and as a dinner date she would, I think, cause quite a stir!! Oh and thank you for the compliment about my humour, I do so try to be funny and most people do admit to me being trying... ~wink~

My third guest this week is quite an artist and his work can often be seen in the WWC. He need no further introduction, it is of course, Jodan who in the same conversation said....

Who would you most like to have as a dinner date?

It depends on what you mean by date. If you mean 'to dinner...' then I don't have to have someone from the opposite sex. I could have someone historical, or someone exciting without the boundaries of gender. I think I'd go with someone like DNA, if he were still with us
. Presently, I'd go with Scott Adams, the cartoonist of the comic strip 'Dilbert'.

If I have to have someone of the opposite sex, I'm afraid I would probably just choose my mother. Incest or not, she makes great goulash.

No doubt DNA would have lots of interesting stuff to tell us about the After Life, in fact if he came to have dinner with you, he might even slip you a copy of his latest manuscript, so that we all have something to do whilst waiting for our turn to join him.

As to your mother making a great goulash, I think that it's time she invited us all round to give it a try. It's no good making us all drool with anticipation only to find we can't ourselves try it. As to having dinner with your mother being incest, have no fear, I think it is perfectly acceptable to take your parents out for a meal, as long as they don't eat any doughnuts of course, that would be VERY wrong indeed!!!

My fourth guest this week wrote not only an answer to the question posed but also a

response to Jodan. Please make her feel at home it's, viojen

who in the same conversation said....

I like that one Jodan. So in proper response:

My roles would be reversed a bit. For someone of the opposite sex I might choose DNA or

maybe Hayden, since I'm trying to learn one of his violin concertos and would love to know

what his original intention was when he wrote the music.

Same sex? Probably a good friend. I couldn't name anyone in particular, but maybe just someone I'd known for a long time but hadn't spent a lot of time with recently. Maybe Renee6612, if any of you know her, to mention someone on h2g2.

But I'd be certain to chose someone I'd enjoy spending the time with, and who wouldn't ruin my meal.

I am sure we all know plenty of people that through one thing or another we have lost contact with... and a meal with any of them would be rather nice. Or indeed a nice meal with someone on h2g2 would be equally as nice.

It's always good solving those little problems that perplex us isn't it, makes you feel better and that all is right with the world. That is until you think up an entirely new question to perplex yourself with, and the idea of having to think up a question to perplex yourself with is perplexing in itself. So to save you the bother I shall come up with a new question for you

to solve, or deliberate over, and maybe another article just like this one but with different

words will spring forth from The Post and onto your computer screens.

So today's question is... roll of drums...

We all have them, certain icons in our lives that we would like to be like. It might be your

parents, a movie star, singer, historical figure or even me. Tell us who or what, and a reason as

to why they would be your perfect choice in a conversation below. As before I will use

whatever facts, information or silliness in a future Doughnut Hole.

Of course you can also enter into any of the conversations featured on this page.

So that's it for this week, another show ended, all the guests have been taken to the green room for a hose down and a quick scrub. These television studios can get mighty warm you know. See you all next time, same Post article, same post channel!!!

This weeks article is brought to by The Post and something I found on the bottom of my

shoe.


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