Once again we are beholden to the current executors of the Knolly estate for letting us publish this, the second package of the great man's journals and memoirs.

Ah! Hoot Hall - home from home. It was true that since our wedding Elspeth and I had not visited as often as we liked to - then again it was not often that my current employment allowed one the luxury of spending time in the country of one's birth.

Surprisingly, the ever-dependable 'Young' Humbert greeted us at the door with a warm smile.

'Master Knolly! Welcome home! Mrs Knolly ... You look divine,' he said.

'Young' Humbert had been a member of Auntie's household for as long as I could remember and had, until recently, primarily looked after Auntie's London residence. He looked ancient when I was a boy, and now - nearly thirty years later - he looked as if he had not aged a day. As far as I could tell, he had never divulged any information regarding his origins; even Auntie claimed that she knew not from whence he came. All that she would say is that 'Uncle Monty brought him home one day and he stayed ever since.' Curious. I am convinced that she knows more than she tells. Maybe I should press her for more detail at some point - although I know well to not to upset her in any way; she can still biff with the best of them.

As 'Young' Humbert took our scant belongings (well, scant considering we were not intending to stay, but you know what women are like) he explained that Aunt Lettice was, unfortunately, not at home.

'Really? Are you sure?' asked Elspeth.

'Young' Humbert thought about this, 'Errr.... Well.... I haven’t seen her this morning sir, but this is a large house….'

He drifted off in thought.

'Oh dear.' whispered Elspeth.

'I trust that she is well?' I prompted.

He shook himself. 'Oh, yes sir! She is enjoying the rudest of health. All that she would tell me is that she needed to attend to some business in Swindon. She sends her apologies and says that you must make yourself at home. I am also to encourage Mrs Knolly to get as much rest as possible. However, I’m not sure now whether she informed me this morning or last week now that I come to think of it....'

'Young' Humbert paused again whilst trying to remember what he was supposed to do next as if the current conversation had thrown him off of his usual routine.

I took Elspeth to one side and pointed up the stairs.

'Goodness me! Is that holly and mistletoe still hanging up there?'

Hmm... It would appear so.'

'Humbert, what are you doing? You know you don’t need to attend to visitors anymore, you're retired now.'

The speaker was a young lady of average height, with curly brown hair down to her shoulders.

'Ah! Good morning Miss. We are here to see my Aunt. She is expecting us but it seems she may or may not be at home. Oh - and it would seem that you still have some Christmas decorations up.'

She bobbed a curtsy. 'Indeed yes. Your Aunt felt that they may as well stay there as Christmas will be upon us in 10 months. Now, Mr Knolly if you would follow me please.'

And she led off down the hallway with us in tow, but poor Humbert was wandering off up the stairs with Elspeth's bags.

'I understand that my benefactor has asked you to secure employment for me?' she continued.

I heard a surprised chuckle behind me and I resisted turning to look at my grinning wife. In being so forward, it was clear that this young ward had obviously already met with my wife's approval.

'You would be Emilia then?' I delved back into my memory. 'My! How you’ve grown.'

She stopped, turned and flashed me a look that spoke volumes.

Oblivious to such looks, I continued: 'How long ago was it that my friend Bertie was juggling oranges and at the same time explaining gravity for you and some of the other girls at my 30th birthday party?'

Elspeth poked me in the ribs from behind.

'Knolly! Enough now! You’re embarrassing the girl.'

'What! All I said was how she’d grown. I mean, I could say that she’s not such a little girl anymore and ….'

Would you like a shovel dear?'

Emilia said nothing but continued down the hallway with no further looks back. We entered the main sitting room the table of which was set for a very large group. Auntie Lettice - clearly not in Swindon - was holding court with a dozen or so of her 'young ladies' of various ages. Emilia took her place on the empty chair on Auntie's right hand, so obviously the current rising star.

'Ah, Knolly! So good of you to visit, you’ll have met Emilia already, I see. She has grown up quite well don’t you think?'

Elspeth coughed and I just smiled and nodded and looked for a spare chair for her. My Aunt whispered something to the girl on her left, who got up and offered her seat. Auntie patted it.

'Elspeth, come sit by me. Sol-Tan has made up a room for you both. Yes, I’m well aware that you intended only to stay for lunch, but I will not hear of it.'

I looked at Elspeth who rolled her eyes as if to say 'I did try'.

'Thank you Aunt. A delay of another day won’t hurt, I’m sure - but I’ll need to get a note to Bertie and Hobbes to let them know we'll be home tomorrow and not tonight.'

'I’m sure "Young" Humbert can pop down to the Post office for you,' said Auntie.

I tried to imagine how long that particular 'pop' might take.

'Really? But I need it to go today and I’ll need him to wait for a reply. I don't mind going myself whilst all you ladies chat together. Really, there's no need to worry about me.'

I looked for a chair, but none seemed free.

'Knolly, why would we worry about you?' She rang a bell and we waited for her faithful man servant to appear.

'So, Knolly what is the real reason for your visit, hmmm? Money? You haven’t broken your automobile already have you? I noticed from your telegram that you intended to travel by railway? Come now, tell your Auntie.'

Elspeth was trying not to laugh and young Emilia was also struggling to keep a straight face at my predicament. Auntie was always like this with me though.

'Auntie, my new mode of transport is fine. It is with Bertie at the moment…'

Her hand shook a little and a small frown appeared. She put her tea down. 'Is that wise, dear?'

'It’ll be fine, Auntie. And no - we are not after money. We came to have a look though some of our old trunks - you know - the stuff that came back from Africa when I was in Washington.'

Auntie looked thoughtful at this. 'I’m sure I'm sure we'll find them dear. Ah! Here is Sol -Tan. Is lunch ready?'

Not quite madam, but I believe you rang for me?'

'Did I indeed? Well, that's as maybe, but now that you're here, do you remember where we put Knolly's trunks and belongings that the naughty lad didn't want to take to London with him?'

'I believe, Madam, that we removed the young sir's effects to the attic.'

'Excellent! Come on Elspeth! Time for a rummage. Lead on Sol-Tan.'

'Knolly, given your wife's condition, I don't think that she should be rummaging. No. Emilia can go with you and you can interview her in the process.'

Elspeth's face dropped. I think that she had harboured desires to rummage around in the cavernous attic and find out some more of those things that make a man tick. But Auntie's word was law and she had spoken. However, I had no desire to see my wife so glum.

'Auntie, I think that’s a sound idea, but once we've located the right boxes I think we should bring them down here. After all, Elspeth knows what she is looking for.'

'I'm not sure that all of my gels should be in the presence of a gentleman's trunks, but feel free to use your room.'

She turned to Elspeth and then to Auntie. I was dismissed. Elspeth made a sign with her hands and I smiled in response.

'Oh and.... um..... Do you really want to leave the Christmas things out?'

'Knolly, they are doing no harm and besides they add a festive quality that is so lacking until spring arrives, don't you think?'

I really didn't have an answer to that and so I turned to Sol-Tan.

'This way, Mr Knolly, sir. Cook won't be ready for an hour yet so you have a while.'

'It's good to see you Sol-Tan. I'm surprised that you or Sag didn't come to meet us at the station.'

He grinned and was about to answer but then quickly went back into servant mode with a barely perceptible shake of his head.

'What did your wife just say to you?' asked Emilia who had appeared by my side.

'Sorry, she didn't say anything.'

Yes she did, she made a sign with her right hand like this.' And she proceeded to mimic the hand signal.

There was no way out of this. The girl - or should I say young woman - was very observant and this was obviously a trait my Aunt thought would be useful to the Service..... And quite possibly why Sol-Tan had gone very quiet.

The Great Knolly Archive

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